Oh, how you yearned for their unrestrained chuckles -- their sparkling smiles -- to be transformed into naught but a cacophony of wailing and ceaseless misery. What gave them the right? Was it their fancy PCs, Macs and Xbox 360s? Did they so enjoy coasting down The Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness on their technological toboggans that they couldn't even cast a single glance towards you, sitting atop a lonely and immobile PlayStation 3? Well, when the snow falls again this Winter, revenge will be yours.

Also, Trophies! Posting on the official PlayStation Blog (they let anybody on there these days), Hothead producer Joel DeYoung confirmed that the first episode of Penny Arcade Adventures would arrive on PSN before the end of the year, complete with Trophy support and 1080p resolution. "Looking back, I think it's a shame that we weren't able to release the PS3 version closer to the initial launch of the game," he said.

With the game's engine now up and running on the hardware, DeYoung expects that future episodes will arrive on Sony's platform in a more timely fashion. No more being left out in the cold, our monolithic friend.

Although Microsoft has hinted at an autumn arrival for the 360's long-awaited, exclusive GTA IV downloadable content, a "source close to Rockstar" has told VG247 "nuh-uh." The quote the site actually got was, "It'll be in January or February."

For those keeping record, the GTA DLC was originally supposed to hit in Q4 2008 (so, before this November), but was delayed due to some corporate numbers mumbo jumbo that we couldn't care less about ... except that it resulted in having to wait longer for more frolicking fun in Liberty City.

It's harder to single out Nintendo for overlooking its "core audience" when you find out things like this. Speaking with GamesIndustry.biz, Shuhei Yoshida, Sony's head of worldwide studios, revealed that the company chose to fund development of a desktop toy virtual pet – EyePet – over a promising core audience action title, Eight Days.

When asked about the effect that canceling London Studio projects The Getaway 3 and Eight Days had on other titles, Yoshida responded, "There are so many things that we want to do, more than we can do with the resources. So when London Studio was looking at the early work on EyePet and the prototype of Eight Days, they knew they couldn't do all of them." So ... EyePet it was.

Granted, we don't know with any certainty that Eight Days was going to be any good, but an original action IP on a still very core audience console would seem like something worth investing more time in over a ... virtual pet.

Yohshida also said regarding the London Studio, "There are even more things they're working on at early concept stage." Tip for the staff there: If you don't want your big games canned, don't mention your "pet" projects to Shuhei the next time he pops in for a visit.

Castle Crashers has invaded Xbox Live Arcade and, unless you're having connectivity issues, chances are you've discovered the charm in this homage revolution modern iteration of the beat 'em up genre. The game seems to be receiving positive reviews for its ambition as an XBLA title, but those pesky connection issues are causing reviewers to shave points off "Castle Crashes'" overall score.

• IGN (90/100): "Castle Crashers takes the best elements of traditional side-scrolling beat-em-ups and adds lots of flair. There's some great humor here and some nice surprises that will please most. ... The bulk of Castle Crashers is an enjoyable ride and one every 360 owner should experience."
• GameSpot (85/100): "Even at a price of 1,200 Microsoft points, Castle Crashers provides great value. The main storyline offers hours of bad-guy beating and princess-rescuing fun that it is sure to please. The ability to play with friends should make the experience richer, even if it is limited to a more local experience. As a testament to its entertainment, feature losses and some disappointing online play hardly slow this juggernaut of amusement down. This is an absurdly hilarious romp you won't soon forget."
• VGT (60/100): "Castle Crashers is an entertaining brawler, but the replay value is chopped into little frustrating bits by a horrifically painful online experience. I'm left wondering why I spent $15 (1200 MS points) on a five-hour single player game. Multiple playthroughs will unlock new characters, but the repetitive nature is a bit tiresome. Avoid purchasing Castle Crashers until the developer sorts the major online problems out."

X3F in Brief and GameTrailer's video reviews can be found after the break.

American McGee's Grimm continues on GameTap this week with The Girl Without Hands -- yup, it's getting darker. Same as every week, the episode is free to non-subscribers for the first 24 hours after release. The service also gets into the drug trade by adding the addictive Puzzle Quest.

• Grimm: The Girl Without Hands (Windows) - Katamari Grimm-acy do your thing!
  
• Puzzle Quest: Challenge of Warlords (Windows) - It's time to finally play this game if you've somehow missed out on it.
  

There aren't any additions to GameTap's gratis games lineup this week, but the full list of free-to-play titles can be found after the break.

Something totally gross is afoot on the intergalactic mining vessel USG Ishimura. The latest issue of the animated Dead Space comic is now available for your viewing pleasure, complete with subtle pans, focus pulls, and just enough squishy sound effects to get the whole thing across.

As far as video game advertising goes, we've gotta say these comics/videos are pretty effective. Watching these chumps try and kill the space-baddies is pretty frustrating when we all know that you need to strategically dismember them. You can't just shoot willy-nilly! And seriously, how do you expect to do any damage without a badass spacesuit and accompanying laser triton? You know what, forget it! We'll just do it ourselves ... drat, advertising!

The Force which compels LucasArts to concoct more ways to utilize the Wiimote for lightsaber gameplay will be with it ... always. According to the latest EGM rumor section, "Quartermann" brings unconfirmed word that the Star Wars factory is looking to follow up its Wii version of The Force Unleashed and The Clone Wars: Lightsaber Duels with yet another lightsaber-centric game, this one utilizing Nintendo's Wii MotionPlus accessory.

You may recall that LucasArts was one of, well, pretty much every Wii third-party left feeling a bit ... seventieth-party by Nintendo's choice to unveil MotionPlus to them on the same day as the public. According to the Q-man, now that the company has access to the tech for development purposes, it wants to make the bestest lightsaber game ever. Might we suggest it be called: Star Wars: Lightsaber Duels – This Time It's Not All Spazzy, Really!

[Via NWF]

The Last Guy, a mash-up of Google maps and "follow the leader" (or Snake, if we can talk super old-school), will be available tomorrow on PSN for $10, according to the PlayStation Blog. The 15 stages of zombie-dodging gameplay takes place in several cities across the globe, which use aerial photography as "levels" -- the demo, which takes place in Asakusa, Tokyo became available last week on PSN. Check out the video after the break for a taste of what The Last Guy has to offer.

As promised, Sony and Incognito have rolled the latest Warhawk update out of its hanger, prompting a mandatory install once you start the game. Major additions for version 1.5 of the game include much-anticipated PlayStation Trophies (57 of them, with a good mix of gold, silver, bronze, and "mystery offerings") and support for custom music via the in-game XMB.

We've just installed the patch and are firing up a match with Hanson's "MMMBop" on full blast! Sure, the update's no new-map-and-rocket-packs gala like the upcoming Fallen Star booster pack – which hits tomorrow – but it's nevertheless another nice show of free support for a still very popular, ever-expanding game.

Far Cry 2's Narrative Designer Patrick Redding informs VG247 that Ubisoft Montreal has started work on the next Far Cry game. He tells the site that Africa still has a "huge amount of promise" and there are still things they'd like to do with the setting, but he hedges it all by saying that the team is still in "preliminary stages" of development.

Redding expresses that the Far Cry 2 engine could be used to make other locales, but that to save time the team will probably build on the sequel's African setting. He wants to stick with the series' exotic settings, but feels that jungle islands aren't as exciting as when the original Far Cry released four years ago.

Continuing with their week-long series, nos amis at X3F talked with Silicon Knights President Denis Dyack over some of Too Human's biggest perceived faults. Part 1 of today's video interview is embedded above. Some highlights:

• On the community's early judgment: "People are trying to understand a game that's inherently interactive [by watching a video] ... All I can say is try the demo."
• On clipping and texture issues: "There's glitches in all games. It's really interesting to me because, as an example, there's gonna be things you can always improve. To me, framerate's not really that essential in cutscenes and it never has been for us ... I don't think Too Human's inconsistent from any of our previous games ... So there's clipping. Oh noes. Bottom line is, does it affect gameplay and by how much? Are there ways to improve Too Human? For sure, but the overall big picture? Happy, extremely happy."
• On the Valkyrie death scene: Dyack estimated it was a 15 and a 1/2 second scene. "If it's a sign that people love the game so much that they just want to get back in and play, could we make it skippable? Sure, it's an easy change. Is it something we ever would have anticipated since we thought it was faster than going to get your body or losing experience [which does not happen in Too Human] ... is that a change we can make in the future? Sure."
• On comparisons to Diablo: "There's this tactical element. People think, 'oh, this is like Diablo with a bit of action. In Diablo I can just go up to an enemy and pound him away [until it dies] and move on to the next one, if you had the better loot, you usually win. In Too Human, if you don't use your tactics, it is a new kind of genre-bender, you're gonna die. And we're looking at some of the feedback and a lot of people are dying. [laughs]"
• On future downloadable content: "I think that's gonna be unique to people who pre-order it, that's a one-time thing. But we've got tons of ideas that will far exceed the pre-order bonus."

Check out part two of the interview after the break.

When the BBFC isn't busy keeping cool, violent games away from kids with totally square parents, they like to leak out the occasional news tidbit, just so all the game journalists think they're "hip." It's actually a little sad, but it's hard to argue with the benefits, like learning the content on the Gears of War 2 bonus disc that comes with the Limited Edition of the game.

Now, because there are some of you who may want to go into the experience completely pure, we've put the list after the break. But the awesome rebels among you should waste no time in clicking below.

Of all of the people who make crap up on the internet, the enigmatic EGM rumormonger Quartermann seems to be the most accurate. This could be because Quartermann is just an amalgamation of different EGM editors and they hear some fairly juicy stuff in their day-to-day, like (for example) the rumor that the same Rockstar team that made The Warriors is busy toiling on Max Payne 3, presumably to cash in on the upcoming movie.

With original devs Remedy hard at work on Alan Wake and Rockstar Toronto not working on anything that we know of, it would seem to add up. In a more nebulous vein, Quartermann also says that Rockstar North, the team behind GTA IV, is hard at work on a PS3 exclusive. You'll know if this rumor is ever confirmed, however, when you see PS3 fanboys with an otherworldly glow and floating a few inches off the ground as a choir of angels sings in the background. Also, 360 fanboys will start throwing themselves off buildings, Happening-style.

The LittleBigPlanet breakdown session was a little different than most. We've been seeing the game at every trade show since it was revealed at GDC 2007. As a result, the session took a more informal Q&A approach, rather than a showcase for the game's features.

Those present – producer Pete Smith and interface designer Jim Unwin – did start off by volunteering some information: Firstly, the game is finished and pretty much ready to go. The European release date has been finalized as October 29th, with other regions to be confirmed later. Barring unforeseen circumstances there's no reason at all why this game shouldn't ship in time.

We were also told that when LittleBigPlanet was first shown at GDC, Media Molecule had only about five members. As much as the presentation at GDC was a glimpse into the PS3's future, it was also a hiring pitch. Media Molecule was looking for new members in order to work on this incredibly ambitious project. The level shown at GDC was the entirety of LittleBigPlanet up until that point. In fact, they hadn't even finalized the name until a few days before.

Red Mile's interactive adaptation of Frank Miller's landmark, hard boiled graphic novel(s), Sin City, has a new-ish developer. The title was originally being handled – presumably with those special gloves used for working with razor wire – by Transmission Games, the same outfit producing Heroes Over Europe for Red Mile. Both games have 2009 release dates.

The publisher, who is working with Atari to get its games onto shelves, tells GameSpot that work on Sin City: The Game was handed to another developer "quite some time ago." Said developer's identity is unknown, but we do know that Frank Miller practically hand-picked his old pal (and The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay writer) Flint Dille to "spearhead the design, scriptwriting, story generation, and overall production" of the game, which will – unsurprisingly – utilize Unreal Engine 3. Also, the color red. Lots of it.

(And no, the new developer isn't Platinum Games, despite MadWorld's more-than-vague resemblance to Sin City.)